Brotherhood flourishes at the Winter Retreat 2018

Yoga is about a lot of things. Sometimes it is about the body, sometimes it is more about the mind, sometimes it is about the spirit, and sometimes it is about the community we create. Yoga is based on yamas and niyamas, a code of conduct for how we treat ourselves and how we treat others. It is a personal and a social practice.

This year's Cape Men's Yoga Winter Retreat was entitled Reunion. This was partly because Nigel came home to South Africa to help with the retreat, partly because many of the traditional teachers of CMY came back from their various journeys of body and mind, and partly it was a statement about reuniting with our personal path, with our beliefs and with ourselves. The word yoga, which comes from the Sanskrit yug, means to unite or harness.

Every retreat is so different. The dynamics change, some of the men change, the weather changes, the times of the year and of our lives change. What remains constant is the shared practice, the bonding, the learning together and being together.

I know there are lots of folks who think a weekend of guys doing naked yoga is an excuse for some group sex. You are welcome to your fantasies, but what happens in a retreat is much more intimate and rare. Men build trust, they build friendships, they show their vulnerable side, they do kind things to support one another. Men of all colours, of different religions, of different financial situations, of different life experiences, came together for this retreat which was all about brotherhood. I hope you are smiling. If you are making cynical remarks in your head, maybe you need to understand a bit more about yourself and that narrative. Men can and are being supportive, respectful and facilitating of one another, and asking to have their own journey recognised and validated.

As an organiser, what stood out for me was how easy it all was. Men accepted each other. Different body shapes, different skin colours, different eating habits, different religions, some circumcised, others not, some young, some quite mature. Most of all there was no pressure to be something other than present. All the pressures that men put on each other to be macho, to look a certain way, to be better than the other - all of that got left outside the retreat. There was some deep acceptance going on. From the hefty and hairy, to slender and smooth, from quiet and inward focussed to making people laugh and feel welcome. It was all there, it was all good.

One of our very special teachers, a backbone of the group at the moment, finished his retreat in tears. We have all been there. Men crying? Right? Yip, sometimes you cry from happiness, sometimes from relief, sometimes there is something very deep which just needs some space to be set free out there. Sometimes you just cry because it is so damned good to be accepted for exactly who you are.

I know there are guys out there terrified to spend a weekend with a bunch of men, others who would worry about how their body is going to look naked, others we the boner anxiety, and definitely quite a few with issues about being vulnerable. You know what? We came away from there feeling whole, feeling like we did something important together, appreciating that the body is just one part of who we are and the journey we are on. In a country with so many issues and fears, what a great blessing to create such a special space. I hope you join us next time.

Thanks to eveeryone who made it possible and particularly Sybille, our incredibly generous host.

Namaste















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